Wedding

So lots of news here. I'm getting married in August and it has been a traumatic planning to say the least. I couldn't convince my mom to come dress shopping with me and we argued over the reception venue. We had planned to go shopping for her mother of the bride dress weeks ago but mom decided it was much more important to attend the home and garden show as my parents have decided to redo both bathrooms here at the house.

Today I finally got my mom out to pick out her MOB dress. I can't say I actually remember ever seeing my mom in a dress before. We managed to find a dress quickly enough that we had time for shoe shopping as well. Somehow my mom ended up picking the exact same shoe as the one I chose for my reception but in a different color. I'm not upset, I think its quite cute. I find it interesting how my mom relies on me for fashion advice and I, in turn, rely on my friends.

I'm glad to have this done with as I am still waiting to hear back from my florist to discuss boutineres and corsages. I guess at some point I should mention that the man I am marrying is not the man I blogged about but the man I have been seeing for just under 3 years now. We're happy together and I can't wait to marry him.

Identity

As I am on the verge of a new beginning, engaged to be married in 3 months, I find myself contemplating the concept of identity. It all started with shoe shopping. One of my bridesmaids commented about needing to buy shoes and I suddenly found myself actually excited to plan a shopping date with my friend. Preparing for this wedding I have found myself embracing some of the more "classically feminine" behaviors. I've come to realize that at 29 years old I'm still trying to figure out who I am. I have embraced the opportunity to try things I never got to do growing up. I didn't go shopping for prom dresses with friends, or pick out shoes, or get my hair done up. Only as an adult have I been able to try these things. I am still trying to figure out what I like or don't like. I'm still trying to understand what it is to be a woman, to be "female."

Not long ago I had an interesting conversation with a co-worker. With gender identity being a topic of conversation these days we were wondering what it actually means to identify as a  woman. I can't tell you what makes me who I am or how I know I'm not something different. If we put stereotypes aside there really is no one-size-fits-all definition. Maybe there is a future where we don't have to identify as anything at all, where we can just be who we are without putting labels on it.

Sadly I think we are still a long ways from that.